Al
This is Al, and he’s not your typical garden gnome. Forget the jolly red hats and rosy cheeks—Al’s the grumpy uncle of the gnome world, carved from a hefty slab of hardwood and carrying the weight of every lawn dispute ever waged. With a sharply pointed gnome cap, deep-set scowl, and a beard that looks like it’s been through centuries of complaints, Al radiates “get off my lawn” energy.
Whether he’s defending your garden or silently judging the neighbors, Al stands his ground. He’s angry, he’s heavy, and he’s not moving for anyone.
Species: Gnome (Disgruntled Subspecies)
Material: Solid hardwood — do not drop him on your foot
Personality: 90% scowl, 10% ancient gnome wisdom
Perfect for: Patrolling the porch, intimidating plastic flamingos, and asserting dominance in the flowerbed
This is Al, and he’s not your typical garden gnome. Forget the jolly red hats and rosy cheeks—Al’s the grumpy uncle of the gnome world, carved from a hefty slab of hardwood and carrying the weight of every lawn dispute ever waged. With a sharply pointed gnome cap, deep-set scowl, and a beard that looks like it’s been through centuries of complaints, Al radiates “get off my lawn” energy.
Whether he’s defending your garden or silently judging the neighbors, Al stands his ground. He’s angry, he’s heavy, and he’s not moving for anyone.
Species: Gnome (Disgruntled Subspecies)
Material: Solid hardwood — do not drop him on your foot
Personality: 90% scowl, 10% ancient gnome wisdom
Perfect for: Patrolling the porch, intimidating plastic flamingos, and asserting dominance in the flowerbed
This is Al, and he’s not your typical garden gnome. Forget the jolly red hats and rosy cheeks—Al’s the grumpy uncle of the gnome world, carved from a hefty slab of hardwood and carrying the weight of every lawn dispute ever waged. With a sharply pointed gnome cap, deep-set scowl, and a beard that looks like it’s been through centuries of complaints, Al radiates “get off my lawn” energy.
Whether he’s defending your garden or silently judging the neighbors, Al stands his ground. He’s angry, he’s heavy, and he’s not moving for anyone.
Species: Gnome (Disgruntled Subspecies)
Material: Solid hardwood — do not drop him on your foot
Personality: 90% scowl, 10% ancient gnome wisdom
Perfect for: Patrolling the porch, intimidating plastic flamingos, and asserting dominance in the flowerbed